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Confessions - 10 doors

She stood watching the door he had just closed walking out. For a moment nothing worked, her brain, her body, her mind, her conscience.. even her breath had stopped. Then she took a long breath and everything started at a time. The explosions in her mind, the devastation in heart, the thundering thoughts in her brain. All she could do was stare at the closed door. 

Pain pierced through her soul like a hot knife through a wound. She struggled to breath, all she wanted to do was howl at the fate which made her stand here and feel this horrible feeling. But she couldn't produce a sound, even call his name. To call him back to her. 

She collapsed on the floor as her knees buckled. Held her midriff in a embrace so tight. The coldness of the situation was settling there and spreading everywhere. And finally a tear broke the barriers and rolled down. 

The gush of tears which flowed down her cheeks were unnoticed, as her heart cried out. The edge of the pain dulled to a throbbing ache in her heart, it was only then did her brain register the underlying boiling stream of anger pulsing through. She looked up towards the door as if she will burn it on the spot. She got up with a gusto and threw whatever her hands could find. She just wanted to destroy everything he touched  just like he destroyed her moments ago. But even after ravaging the whole room it was still not close to what she felt. 

She wiped her tears steeling herself to feel no pain, convincing herself that he is not worth it and got about to cleaning the room and repairing the damage she had done as much as it was possible. And walked towards the doors to open it to a new light, to a new life.

He stood outside those doors of that cursed room, where just a moment before his life ended. For a long moment no sound came through it and he shoved his hands into his pockets. Just to stop himself from opening those doors and run back to her.

After what seemed like an eternity her sobs sailed through those doors and he let out his breath which he didn't know he was holding. Her sobs which seemed like it was wrenched out of her soul by filled his heart with darkness. He chided himself, cursed himself and vowed to never love again. But still he couldn't do the one thing he wanted to do. To hold her his arms and say sorry, beg her to take him back, naming him a fool to let her go.

He sat down on the floor beside the door and a tear tumbled down. He didn't know how long he sat there or what he would do if she picked that moment to come out. He half wished she would do just that and half wished she wouldn't.

After what seemed like an eternity he heard the bang. His first instinct was she has harmed herself. He would never forgive himself if something happened to her. He got up in a hurry and was about to open the doors, when he heard the crash and her angry cry. He pulled back his hands which were hovering on the door knob. 

He knew it was time, time to go. He knew now she will be fine because now she will hate him. He knew she will live and live happily because now she will not grieve. He stood their listening to her anger, listening to the wreck he caused to her. His head hung in shame, his heart chided him. But his mind stood strong in its decision and he knew he has to walk away. The crashes and bangs stopped as he walked away from her door. He opened the main door to go out of her life and to never return back, as he was about to close the door behind him, he turned back to look at her door one last time. And both the doors clicked at the same time. 

(Excerpt from a story I am working on)

Comments

  1. "She just wanted to destroy everything he touched just like he destroyed her moments ago"

    Superb lines..only the affected soul knows how much it was hurt by something,,

    The two faces of the situation..nicely etched...the feel..the pain..the warmth...everything is in a perfect package.

    There could be 100's of reasons for the sudden twist in their behavior...but the ill fates affection, emotions..no one can balance..

    It is stopped at crucial phase where either it can break or it can take a brake..beautiful CB yet again

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nivedita you have immense imagination weaving ability..nice writeup. Simply...simply... churning emotions...as I read through...I liked....the whole story!!! but these lines...made me..."Yes, this is Life, live it and leave it" fantastic rendering of emotions into wordful musical notes...Nivi. !!! She wiped her tears steeling herself to feel no pain, convincing herself that he is not worth it and got about to cleaning the room and repairing the damage she had done as much as it was possible. And walked towards the doors to open it to a new light, to a new life.

    ReplyDelete
  3. emotions Well presented... what could be the reason for this... am awaiting Nivs :) hope you tell us in the next episode or so :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Beautifully narrated DQ. Both of them have a story to tell...just awaiting for d flashback story..

    ReplyDelete

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