IMHO - Blue mug epiphany

I have often heard, "our relationship is solid".. "Its so tight that it is impossible to break it" .. always made me wonder, "Really! solid? unbreakable???". And when I saw people being disappointed or hurt because something changed in the relationship, it made me question it. I know when we say solid, we relate it to strength and dependability of the relationship. Which makes us feel secure, safe. That this is one thing we can always count on. 

I accepted the premise and walked in the same road, but always wondered. You will ask why!.. because we human beings are dynamic, not static.. not stationary. Every moment of our life adds to the vast pool of experience which surely but subtly changes our state of mind, thinking and opinions. Oh there are some exceptions ofcourse, who never deviate from their beliefs, routines and opinions. But I think even they stay strong in their beliefs  or routines because every new knowledge is processed and discarded in favour of their old beliefs and routines. So in a way that is also a change of un-changeability. 

While sub-consciously we know that everything about us changes. Time being the biggest contributor makes every emotion and thought insignificant compared to the coming onslaught of experiences. So I understood the need and desperate wish to have atleast one rock solid thought or relationship to hold on in this tide. One safe place attached to solid emotion in our heart to go and breath a sigh of relief and re-energize to meet the torrent of new emotions.   

Explaining the need somehow I always questioned ... How can relationships be constant if we ourselves are the variables of change? 

Today while having my usual mug of tea an epiphany struck. "The blue mug epiphany". I have this beautiful transparent blue mug. Whenever I have my tea in that I feel like that part of my day is more colourful than normal. The beauty is no matter what I use the mug for, to drink tea, coffee, water, cool drink. The liquid looks blue and sparkling with colour. 

But the next day I might just not be able to use the blue mug and use another one.. maybe a red one. Then my colourful part of day has a beautiful red hue. 

Like our relationships..... How??

Relationships are like liquid it can be clear as water, soothing as coffee, intoxicating as alcohol, refreshing as cool drink and while all that it can also be in a blue mug, steel cup, clear glass mug .............anything. The liquid literally takes any shape you put it in. The liquid is your relationships, the container is your thoughts and core emotions which bind it. Well my epiphany was not this. My thoughts continued to next part.

That the paradigm or premise of the relationship can change at any time. By just one shared secret or one concealed thought. One reassured support or one revelation of depth. As and when the details are added or deleted, so and then the characteristic of the drink changes. It might be the shape, colour, feel of the container or the  temperature, taste and effect of the drink. Just like a relationship. It changes, it has to change, that is its core characteristic. 

So while you think it as a strong solid piece or free airy breeze and I dearly understand the need for it, In My Humble Opinion - both forms neither has the fluidity nor the binding necessary to keep a relationship true. And that fluidity is needed as, if your relationship is solid and stagnant, it cannot grow with you, change with your present you. It will stay where it was built, unmoveable as you move on. It needs to change according to your emotions, mould itself around your heart. Then you wont need a small place in the corner of your heart to refresh. It is always around you to protect you against anything time dares to throw at you.